Some things are just too hard to put to words.


There are times when things just seem to tough to write about, then one thinks its all ok ,the stress is over life is good,how come the mind is till in turmoil then?
I have not blogged for a little while, we had a huge family trauma and I have been away helping but I sat here many times to write but could not, I do not understand.

Last week our eldest granddaughter Lilli  aged 10 became quite ill.She has had  indigestion for over a year  and then headaches for days,nothing Kirsty gave her could shift it,after going to the Doctor and blood tests they were no sooner home than the phone ringing saying her hemoglobin count was very low,come back for more tests, doing so the same again,it had dropped even more,she was taken to hospital and same again ,by this time she was passing blood,her usually beautiful brown skin was yellow and her face white.She was taken to a larger hospital for furthur investigation, by now a full body scan was done and a Meckles Divicum? (can't spell it),this is like a pouch coming off the intestine,left over from not closing off as a baby,these are usually found in the first year of life, this thing is like an alien,it makes its own acids etc and wa wrapped around her bowel so her body had to cope with double acids etc it was found and was bleeding and about to errupt,life threatening, she was given blood and operated on immediately. We are so blessed that Lillli got through as it may have not been that way.She is so brave we are so proud of her but it has been a harrowing week to say the least.
As I sat to write about it when I came home ,I found that I had coped while I drove the 2 hours to get to my son and his family,he had to wait back until I could get there with his little boys,then he could go to his wife and  sick child, then the boys were so upset about their sister that their behaviour was so out of the ordinary but it was understandable although for the first time ever it reduced me to tears, having said that it was probably the shock that made me that way too.Then driving home I was exhausted  and although all was well and we actually had Lilli home after 3 days as the the op went beautifully and the recovery quite quick,the trouble was in the before not the after, I found that the whole event caught up with me,how strange that we cope while its all happening and crumble when it is all over.
I praise God that it all happened on the actual day it did, I have only just gotten a girl to do every second Friday for me, we used to have only the work car but recently got another small car for emergencies! and I had Bob to look after Mum.It never fails to surprise me how things work to a rhythm.
Having said all that I am in total selfish mode as when I turn on the news our country is ravaged by floods, we have family in these areas too,at the moment they are safe, a little 4 years old dies this morning while they tried to rescue him, there are 76 missing that they know of, there are at least 13 dead,people have lost absolutley everything and it is not even near over yet, it is coming into our state now and is where my mother in law lives and just a flash came across to where I go delivering mail, I won't be crossing creeks today, what I am saying is wake up Carole, Lilli is safe!shake yourself girl and see what we can do to help these people that will never be the same again.
Thanks for listening to my ramblings,I am so thankful for all we have,I do not know how people cope when the outcome is the loss of a child, we were and are so blessed.