It sits heavily on my shoulders that so many in my age group have passed away.
Today I turn 62, I am so happy to still be here and in pretty good health,to me the wrinkles are my life story, the lines beside my eyes show I have laughed more times than I have cried,the grey hair on the sides are blending in with the blonde ,my hairdresser this week commented that most come and pay for streaks mine are natural lol.
The little stretch marks on the tummy gently remind me of carrying a 8lb 12 and 9lb13 baby many years ago and are part of me, The cellulite I could easily part with but the rest can stay.I am no beauty by my heart is good I think,people remember actions far longer than your looks(I tell myself).
Yesterday my brother called, another of his friends passed away,they were in Vietnam at the same time,all have died by the age of 68 or so,he is 66 this year and said that it is obvious that the ravages of a very different war is not going to have men live long lives,this is 4 in the last 12 months that he actually knew.
In the last 4 years I helped nurse 2 of my friends through their last days one 53 and one 56,both with motor deseases,horrible way to die..then 2 years ago a friend and her daughter were taking beloved pets to the vet,racing madly down a country road,both avid chatters and we can imagine them doing this when BANG! they ran into a truck,both Sue and Kim and the two dogs killed instantly,Kim being 20 and Mum 52.
I am not trying to morbid or anything just saying how precious life is.
For all you darlings who are turning the BIG 40 and BIG 50 and thinking "gosh I am getting old", be delighted in your age, revell in the fact that life has been good even if there has been some illness or still is you are still here with your loved ones.
Grab everyday with both hands,don't put things off, do them,make that call,eat that last piece of cake.If you want to wear something outlandish do so,who cares ,your heart is happy.
Recently I went to the beach with the grandchildren,all the beach babes were out and I thought "poor Bob is going to put his neck out" not knowing what to look at first lol then I forgot he is getting older,he saw a pie van and wanted something to eat! with all those delightful dishes to look at he was hungry for food! he is getting old lol.I had my swimmers on,celulite legs covered by a serong hoping no one would look at me the water was freezing as the normal warm waters had not hit the central coast at that point,children calling to me "come in Nanny".I put one toe in and thought 19 is too cold for me,I will just wave, then I thought if I die tomorrow will I regret this day,the answer was yes,so in I went,I tell you the pain started from the feet and after 20 minutes everything up to the boob line was literally frozen!Then Elijah announced he was too cold, lovely Nanny offered to take him back to shore and wrap a towel around him,what a life saver!he then thanked me for taking him for a swim,a memory he will hold and I could have so easily decided no,he did not notice the cellulite,he just had Nanny and thats all he and his siblings wanted.
So far for my birthday I have had many calls from beautiful friends,grandchildren calling me and singing happy birthday from afar,lovely cards and gifts from Bob and Mum and this evening a surprise visit from our beautiful Kate and her children for the night,we did not excpect to get to see her till the end of Feb,I have made nectrine jam, preserved peaches and pears,now havng a coffee and doing a blog and have read all my favourite ones,what more could a girl want.
Life is to be cherished,I never take time to smell the roses,I hit the ground running at 5am every day so I am promising myself to slow down a little and take the time to enjoy each segment of the day.
Everyday is an adventure,we just forget that it could very well be our last.